Sick Spirit

Day 8: There is no blog spirit flowing through me today so I give you another poem. I promise that I will have an exciting entry tomorrow as I am hanging out with the fabulous Ashley. I wrote this poem when I was very depressed and suicidal, a state I am no longer in. I'll post a happy poem...as soon as I think of one. Writing about happy things is hard. The sad things are easy.

Sick Spirit

The words won’t even come

I’m so tied up inside

can’t even bother thinking

of any rhymes, I just

want this demon out of me.

I wish I could go back to

when no one knew.

When it was just me

dealing with everything.

Then I was only disappointing

myself and not everyone else.

Now all of these people care

I don’t want their love or

the talks they give about

how good life really is,

how I can’t go that route.

I’ll do whatever I please

when it comes to myself.

Even if that means destroying

me and taking cutting off the shelf.

I never really put it away

we were just on a little break

but now we’re on more than

ever before and now I remember

why we were ever together.

I’ll take my own life if need be

to escape these bad feelings

and no one can stop me

and I don’t want them to

because I’m really doing it

this time, no more bluffing

it’s happening in a fit

of anger and lust, lust to

see myself turn into dust.

I’m sick of their concern,

I’m sick of talking,

I’m sick of advice,

really, I’m just sick of life.